Let's Power Up Your Storytelling!
5 Powerful Ways to Begin a Scene
(Originally published January 23, 2023)
Hey, storyteller!
The opening lines and paragraphs of your story, and every scene within it, must grab the reader's attention and pull him or her into the viewpoint character's experiences. If they don't, readers will lose interest…or never get invested in the first place.
There are a number of ways to begin a scene, and using a variety will keep readers guessing and make them turn pages.
In this week's writer coaching session, we'll discuss how to use each style of scene opener to best serve your story.
You will discover:
- what a scene opening should accomplish
- how to use setting or action to begin a scene
- how to open a scene with narrative summary, indirect thought, or dialogue
- how to indicate a shift in point of view in your scene's opener
I Have a Gift for You!
Before we get into all that, I have a gift for you, just for visiting my blog. My free workshop, Six Essential Elements of a Powerful Story.
Whether you're figuring out how to begin your next scene, or polishing up the transitions in your entire story during the editing phase, your goal is the same. To make sure your story is as strong as possible.
This 25-minute video workshop helps you do so with tips on how to ramp up your characters, plot, setting, conflict, and theme, along with how to write all this in a way that makes readers feel like they're living the adventure of the story with your characters.
And be sure to stick around to the end of this post, so you won't miss this week's Power-Up, a super practical action step you can use right now in the story you're working on.
🎬 This post is Part 4 in our series on how to write powerful scenes. 🎬
What a Scene's Opening Needs to Accomplish
A strong, engaging scene beginning sets the stage, shifts the tone, hints at the scene's content and direction, and establishes the voice of your viewpoint character. A gripping opening also hooks readers and forces them to keep turning pages.
The best guideline for how to choose which type of opening to use for a specific scene is to always serve the story. Determine what will create the most excitement and highest reader engagement for this moment in the character's journey.
Opening a Scene with Setting
Two of the reasons for starting a new scene involve setting: either a change in location or a significant passage of time between events.
Even if a scene change occurs for another reason, we should always make certain that the beginning of every scene includes some reference to time and place. To become fully immersed in the viewpoint character's experiences, readers need to know where and when events are occurring.
If a new setting will be essential to the coming event, a larger portion of the scene's beginning may need to focus on it. Just be sure to show action, something happening, in that setting. Readers often skip chunks of description that have no action and don't move the plot forward.
Here's an example of a scene opening that focuses on a change in location from my novel Keeper of Shadows.
The following evening, Lyssanne shook damp hair from her face and tossed more brush onto the fire. Who would guess that a bath in a sun-warmed spring could refresh the soul?
She glanced in the direction Jared had taken to search for firewood, but only the shadows of garments hanging to dry in the trees interrupted the light of the full moon. Dusting off her hands, she sat beneath a tree to watch shimmers dance across the spring and glitter off Raina's horn.
Notice how we indicated the time in the scene's transition. "The following evening" gives us the time of day and the scene's relation to previous events. For the place, we mentioned the brush fire, a sun-warmed spring, relaxing against a tree. So, we know this is taking place in a forest.
We've also mentioned the location of other key characters. Jared, for example, has gone to search for firewood, so he's not at the camp at the moment. And if the shimmers are glinting off Rena's horn—Rena's a unicorn, by the way—then we know Rena is nearby and in the same location as the viewpoint character.
All these details are also woven into the character's actions or depicted as part of her indirect thoughts.
Opening a Scene with Action
Another way we can open a scene is with action.
Many stories and scenes in classic literature begin with pages of beautiful description and poetic narration, but today's readers want action right away. That doesn't have to mean explosions, battles, or life-and-death races against time. It just means something needs to be happening.
A scene can start when this action begins, in the middle of the action, or near its end.
At the Beginning
The easiest way to begin a scene with action is to start it either moments before or just as the action is starting to happen. This hooks readers, since they want to know how the events play out.
Here's an example from Mirrored Secrets, the first book in a series I'm co-authoring with my friend Rebecca Bergen.
In the middle of obligatory applause for another fellow student's successful Capacitance Trial, Jazlyn nudges me. “So, how was dinner?”
Before I can answer, our riser sinks to ground level, and my seat vibrates. All the air whooshes out of my lungs on a single breath, and no amount of gasping can refill them.
Jazlyn's voice filters through the pounding of my heart. “That bad, huh?” She grips my arm and shakes it. “Cel, you're as white as Zipsi.”
“It's me,” I whisper, staring out at the field and trying to force my legs to work.
“What? You're up?” Jaz says. She squeezes my arm as I nod. “Good luck, Cel.”
In this example, a tiny snippet of conversation happens before the action begins. The riser the friends are sitting on starts to lower to the ground. This is significant because their riser lowers to let Celeste, the main character, out so she can go onto the field and perform the tasks for this test, toward which the story has been building. So, that lowering riser starts the action of the scene, because it is the indicator that this anticipated event is about to happen.
In the Midst of the Mayhem
You can also start your scene in the middle of the mayhem.
Beginning in the middle of action has a dramatic effect on the story and on readers. Don't hesitate to throw your reader into the middle of a high-stakes conversation or event.
Here's an example from Trust Unknown, the working title of a novel my friend Rebecca Bergren is currently working on.
Kaeli dug her heels into the mattress, her racing pulse throbbing in her ears. A large, clammy hand covered her mouth, and a scream lodged in her throat. Stale, musky body odor filled her flaring nostrils.
The faceless shadow loomed closer, his fingers digging into the skin of her throat. She thrashed, fighting for air that refused to fill her lungs. The hand covering her mouth squeezed, then slid over her jaw. He picked her up by the neck, her locket digging into her collarbone.
In this scene, the viewpoint character wakes up with this happening. That's one reason we are thrown right into the middle of the action. Someone broke into her apartment and attacked her, and as a reader, I've gotta know what happens next! (My apologies for leaving you with a cliffhanger, but you'll have to wait for the published book to find out how Kaeli gets herself out of this situation.)
And the End Approaches
You can begin a scene with the conclusion of action from a previous cliffhanger.
In the following example from Keeper of Shadows, the first section is the ending of one chapter, and the section after the scene break is the beginning of the next one.
Just beyond the tip of her nose, three hairy, jointed legs wriggled like those of an enlarged spider. And she was to be its fly. That thought was her last before the shimmery threads covered her nose and eyes.
~~~
Breathe. The thought whispered past the pounding in Lyssanne's ears. Just breathe.
The cocoon's threads molded to every dip and curve of her face, pulling at her skin with each breath she managed to squeeze in or out.
Notice, we didn't have to identify where the viewpoint character was or the timing, because the second chapter picks up right where the first one left off. We do identify our viewpoint character, Lyssanne, right away to let the reader know we're still in her head. The actions of the monster that is attacking her will also let the reader know that no time has passed and the setting is the same
Here are some guidelines for beginning a scene with action:
- You can use surprising action (a car crash, a fight, an attack, a sudden health issue, etc.)
- The action must be true to the character's nature. (An introverted, shy protagonist wouldn't suddenly hop up onto a stage at the school's talent show, unprovoked, and belt out a song.)
- Show the viewpoint character acting first and thinking later.
- Keep in mind that action scenes should contain these two elements: time and momentum.
- Timing: Make sure the timing before and during the action fits the event.
- Before: it takes time to plan a heist, blackmail someone, stage a scene that will embarrass someone else, plan an elaborate celebration, et cetera. So if you're going to start with this type of action, make sure you've shown the planning stage previously.
- During: Some events happen quickly. Others unfold more slowly. So, make sure the timing fits the type of event you're depicting.
- Momentum: The action should continue to unfold and progress in intensity throughout the scene.
Opening a Scene with Dialogue
Tossing the reader into a riveting conversation between characters can be a powerful way to start a scene. Just be sure to identify the speakers and clarify which is the viewpoint character.
Here's an example from Mirrored Secrets, the story I mentioned earlier that I'm writing with my co-author, Rebecca Bergen.
“It's taking too long, Jack.” My stomach churns as I imagine all sorts of horrible scenarios of what Celeste could be going through. Is she alive? Is someone still hurting her?
Just a quick note: we know who the viewpoint character is in this scene because we use the name of the viewpoint character at the beginning of each scene when we transition. This novel is told from the perspectives of three characters, who all have first person viewpoints. If your story is written in third person POV, you’d use the viewpoint character’s name in a dialogue attribution instead. So, just be sure to identify the viewpoint character in some form.
Dialogue at the beginning of a scene can be used to reveal the viewpoint character's choices, desires, or dilemmas; or show the viewpoint character's reactions to events that occurred in a previous scene.
Opening a Scene with Narration or Indirect Thought
The fourth way we can open a scene is with a narrative transition or a character's indirect thought.
Exposition
Often, a scene will begin with narration in the form of description, a brief summary of actions, or indirect commentary—all from the perspective of the viewpoint character if you're writing in limited or first person point of view, or from the perspective of an unknown character if you're using distant or omniscient point of view.
In this type of prose, called exposition, dialogue is not used and actions are mentioned in summary instead of playing out on stage,
How do we write transitions that use general narrative exposition or narrative summary?
We can use descriptions through the lens of the viewpoint character's perspective. Remember, everything in a scene should be written in the voice of your viewpoint character.
Here's an example from Keeper of Shadows.
The watcher perched on a step just below the uppermost landing of his lady's winding tower staircase. The sun's burnished eye winked at him through the arrow slit, bathing the surrounding stone in an orange glow. If the acrid steam seeping through the open doorway of the chamber above was any indication, he'd find no hidden exit point here.
No matter. His thorough search of the secluded manor and the mountainside on which it stood had yielded several options, should the need for secret entry or escape arise.
You can use a short narrative summary of what has happened since the end of the last scene. In the following example from Keeper of Shadows, this summary is underlined.
After traveling farther west along the clifftop for several days, Reina led the group to the one place where they could descend.
So, that first part summarizes the fact that the group has been traveling for days. This lets us know the time period that has passed and what they've been doing during that time. The transition isn’t even a whole sentence.
Indirect Thought (a.k.a. Free Indirect Style)
if you open with a character's indirect thought, these are not the thoughts that we would put in italics. They're not worded exactly how the character would think them, using first person pronouns for that character and present tense. An indirect thought may be in present tense only if the story itself is written in present tense. Otherwise, it should be in past tense.
For tips on how to format indirect thoughts and more explanation of what an indirect thought is, check out this post.
If we open a scene with indirect thought, we can show a character's reactions to previous or ongoing events. Here's an example from Mirrored Secrets.
Cold air seeps into the darkness, biting at my shoulder and oozing down my arms to do battle with the blotches of heat stinging them. I draw in a shaky breath before my groggy mind remembers to fake unconsciousness.
My heart stutters, stifling my breath before I even have a chance to hold it. They'll know I'm still alive. He will know.
We can see what the character is experiencing through her thoughts. We mentioned the cold air and the stinging—she has burns on her arms because of something she experienced in a previous scene— so we know the temperature and some details about the setting, but we also get her thoughts and emotions. She's trying to pretend to be unconscious, so her attackers won't know that she's still alive or awake.
None of this is italicized (except for one word that is emphasized). It's part of the narration, so deeply entrenched in the voice and viewpoint of the character that it really is an indirect portrayal of her thoughts.
You can also use this kind of opening to raise a question that makes readers think. Here's an example from Trust Unknown.
What was it about this girl that was so different from other jobs? Was her resemblance to Lilly a confirmation of his suspicions? He'd been asking himself that question since the beginning, when he'd seen her picture and listened to Eddie's story.
We can also use this type of opening to make a shocking statement. Let’s examine another example from Trust Unknown:
Dying. The only man who could see him was…dying.
Opening a Scene with a Shift in Point of View
No matter how you choose to open a scene, be sure to identify the character through whose viewpoint or perspective the reader will experience the events.
You can do this in several ways:
- If the scene is written in third person: Within the first few lines, use the viewpoint character's name or a detail readers will recognize as belonging to that character.
- If the story is written in first person point of view and scenes alternate between viewpoint characters, you may need to use the viewpoint character's name as a chapter title or scene header the way I mentioned earlier. (If you're writing in first person point of view and have a single viewpoint character throughout the story, there won't be any need to do this.
Immerse the reader in the mind and worldview of the new viewpoint character by wording descriptions and narrative passages in the language, style, and word choice that character would use. Also use sayings, expressions, and comparisons that fit the viewpoint character's experiences and personality. For example, a character who was raised in a fishing village might use comparisons related to fishing.
This Week's Power-Up
For this week's Power-Up, examine the opening of the current scene you're working on and ask yourself the following questions:
- Does it clearly identify the viewpoint character?
- Is the location clear?
- Does it show how much time has passed since the events of the previous scene or clarify that this event is happening at the same time as the previous one?
- Does it maintain the tone of the previous scene or convey a shift? (Either can be good, depending on the needs of the story and the voice of your viewpoint. character.)
And be sure to look at the closing of the previous scene and examine how it flows into the opening of the new one.
- Does it feel smooth or jarring?
- Does the ending of the previous scene give readers a compelling reason to move to the next one?
- How do these two scenes relate to each other?
The transitions we use can also depend on what type of scene we're writing and the type of scene that follows it.
To explore twelve types of scenes your story may include, check out this post.
And let's power up your storytelling!
A Helpful Resource
Some of the information I’m presenting in this series is based on the book Make a Scene: Writing a Powerful Story One Scene at a Time by Jordan Rosenfeld.
The "Writing Powerful Scenes" Series
Related Posts
Let's Connect!
Make Your Story Powerful!
Watch my FREE 25-minute video workshop to learn the 6 elements every story needs so readers will experience the characters' journey with maximum emotional impact.
You'll also receive weekly writing tips and training via email. We'll never send spam. Unsubscribe at any time
© 2023 B Squared Writer Coaching